Fastpitch Quick Links

Just for Parents

Bookmark this site!

---

FREE Membership Sign Up Here
E-mail:
Name:
I am a:	Coach Parent Player Other

Membership includes additional resources and tips to improve skills as a coach, player, or parent.

Please double check e-mail address before submitting.

Are You Holding Your Daughter Back with Softball?

As a former softball player, current softball coach and parent, I know this sport has a lot to offer.

However, I was talking to another coach one day, who is also a parent, and he said something that really got me thinking. He was talking about how not everyone is good at softball. We see players each year that simply don’t excel at the sport. Some of them really enjoy playing and that’s fine. But there are others that don’t seem to really enjoy it. They play because it’s expected. Their whole family is involved with softball or baseball and they’ve been playing since they were 6, that sort of thing.

This coach I was talking to said that if he were the parent of that type of player he’d have them do something else. At first I thought, well this game isn’t only for all-star players. I don’t agree with idea that just because you aren’t the best of the best you shouldn’t play and you should just go find something else to do.

But then he said, “Not everyone is good at softball, but there is something that they are good at.” That got me. Right then and there I began looking at the situation from another perspective. Some players don’t really excel. Some players have been playing this game for 5+ years because their parents put them in it when, really, they rather be doing something else. These players are spending a lot of time on softball when they could be spending all that time on something that will be more beneficial to them in the long run. They could be participating in another activity that falls in line not only with their interests, but with their skills and strengths. I mean, many players won’t even continue playing softball beyond high school and it’s even less likely that any of them will earn a living with it. So why not have them do something they will continue beyond high school and something that they may actually make a career out of one day?

I know many parents say, “I’d rather have my daughter playing sports than not doing anything after school and getting into trouble.” I totally agree. I’m not saying stop softball and do nothing else. Replace softball with an activity that your daughter may go further with in life. Maybe you’re thinking, “Well my daughter doesn’t even know what she wants to do.” And you know what? You’re probably right, but you’ve never given her the chance to find out because you’ve been keeping her busy with softball this whole time. Maybe your daughter is better at Kung Fu, or Band, or Singing, or Speech, or Math, or Debate. Heck maybe your daughter has a knack for sales! Who knows?

It doesn’t necessarily have to be run of the mill extracurricular school activity. If your daughter is interested in art, find her an art place to intern or volunteer time at. She may not be an artist, but it doesn’t mean she can’t study art. She will be doing something she has great interest in. She will be learning more about herself and what their strengths are. She will possibly be learning things that she will be able to take into life, into a job, and maybe even into a career. Wouldn’t that me more valuable than having her go through another year of softball that she doesn’t even really want to do? That type of activity may even cost you less than softball while having a bigger benefit to her. Imagine that!

If you daughter loves the game, loves to play, loves being part of a team, and has a blast playing, then by all means, allow her to play. Or if she is also involved in other activities that she has greater interest in as well, that’s fine too. But if she doesn’t really enjoy the game, isn’t excelling at it, and doesn’t do anything else, but would like to; maybe it’s time to let her.

I’m not saying don’t let your daughter play softball if she’s not the best. You know I love this game and thinks it’s great. But not everyone is a softball player. It’s okay if your daughter isn’t good at softball and doesn’t want to play it. Instead of being disappointed help her find out what she does like and what she is good at. Let her be herself and let her excel where she is strong. It may not be softball, but I’m sure there is something out there that she can do well. Allow her to find out what that is.